Days to come...

My last post was on "Days Gone By..." the history of our lives. 

At some point in our life the realization that our days are numbered and God is the one who knows that number really becomes a loudly proclaimed TRUTH.

I suppose the subject of mortality has been in the back of my mind ever since my "cancer" diagnosis a few years ago.  Once "death" almost smacks you in the face I think one begins to "think" a little differently about "life and living".  You begin to review your "living" of life and what may once have been so important suddenly becomes the "least" important on your list. One's outlook on life drastically changes.  Your WINDOW's view of the WORLD is different today than it was yesterday when you thought your life was in your own hands.  We never "expect" to die. We always think that's for older people and until it hits your own life or family it seems distant.

Yes, I believe God is totally in control of my life.  Yes, I believe in His faithfulness, and love.  No, I'm not doubting His mercy and goodness.  He is GOD and He is GOOD all the time.  Yes, I believe in His WORD.  I love His Word.  I love to feel His presence HUG me and I love to feel His Shekinah Glory sweep over the congregation during a church service.  I love God with ALL my Heart, Mind, and Soul!!

I KNOW He's there through all of life's twists and turns, ups and downs.  Yes, He's there!  Even during a trying day full of trials and hardships... He's there and I know he's there!  Some of my days are not perfect in this imperfect world I live in... but He's there!  I'm not giddy with a school-girl infatuation, I've a deep rooted love and JOY in my Salvation!

When "those days" come... I can begin to "Praise Him" and praise right through the trial.  I've had the Holy Ghost since just after my 8th Birthday... He has never disappointed me.  I'm not one of His perfect children (are there any?)... I have my days when I have to get a grip on my attitude.  I work with the public everyday and I cannot reflect inner feelings to my clients. 

I'm one of those pilgrims who are on a journey through this world and I'm headed for the PROMISE Land.  The path may be rough at times... but there's always the "refreshing time" of His presence when He's walking right beside us, leading and guiding us on that path. 

As a pastor's wife of 40-years, I've seen those newly birthed struggle with the cares and concerns of life and sometimes the baggage of their past life seems to cling tightly.  My concern is that we pray, teach, and be REAL people to these who struggle with trials and tribulations. 

Time marches on... tomorrow will be here in about 4 minutes!  I want to be REAL to those who enter into the realm of my life and through the doors of our church.  I want to encourage them... "you can make it through".  Hold tightly to those out stretched hands. 

Maybe some who are reading this think I'm being "un-joyful", I'm not!  But I've seen the hurting, the helpless, and the hopeless.  Our cities are full of them.  My heart goes out to those who are "forgotten" or "overlooked" and I'm not just talking about the homeless.

And there go I, except by the grace and mercy of God...

I never want to forget that could be me.  Yes, I'm thankful I was raised in a God-fearing Pentecostal-Apostolic home.  Yes, I'm thankful for Sunday School teachers and ministers/pastors who taught the Word.  I'm thankful for the fellowship of my Brothers and Sisters in the LORD.  I'm thankful for a husband/pastor who preaches and teaches God's Word.  I am blessed!

Well Tomorrow has arrived...and it's another Day I choose to purposely live for Jesus. 

Let's be REAL for JESUS... I always think of the "Velveteen Rabbit" story... I want to have bare spots, torn spots, lose an ear or eye, come unstitched with the stuffing hanging out from  being "used" everyday.  I want to be vulnerable, open and willing to be used anyway He wants to use me.    I don't want to be stuck on the shelf and never taken down. 

Let Him choose me, that's my prayer!

 

Technorati Tags: Thoughts,Bible,JOY,God,REALNESS,Vulnerable,thankful,mercy,grace,Praise

Bless the LORD, O my soul...

 

I woke this morning with a heavy heart and "my spirit" was downhearted.  Not totally aware of the reason for my downheartedness, I worked through the morning, being careful NOT to let my spirit reflect outwardly.  

At 1:30pm I jumped into my car for my hour lunch break thinking I was going to run some errands like I usually do.  I soon found myself  parked in a parking lot just down the street from where I work, asking myself "what am I doing here?"  I soon discovered the reason I had parked.

Grabbing my Bible out of my satchel, I opened immediately to Psalm 103... these words jumped out at me: (the underlining is my emphasis)

Bless the LORD, O my soul; and all that is within me, bless His holy name!

Bless the LORD, O my soul, and forget not all His benefits.

I then read on:

Who forgives all your iniquities, who heals all your diseases.

Who redeems your life from destruction, who crowns you with loving kindness and tender mercies,

Who satisfies your mouth with good things, so that your youth is renewed like the eagle's.

The LORD executes righteousness and justice for all who are oppressed.

He made known His ways to Moses, His acts to the children of Israel.

The LORD is merciful and gracious, slow to anger, and abounding in mercy.

Read all the verses... but then again beginning with vs.17:

But the mercy of the LORD is from everlasting to everlasting on those who fear Him, and His righteousness to children's children.

To such as keep His covenant, and to those who remember His commandments to do them.

The LORD has established His throne in heaven and His kingdom rules over all.   (Read on...)

The last verse of Psalm 103:

Bless the LORD, all His works, in all places of His dominion.  Bless the LORD, O my soul.

Well, needless to say, after reading this chapter... my heart was once again refreshed and full of God's love and mercy and my faith and trust in His will was strengthened!  How could I ever have doubts about His will?  After all these years.... you'd think I'd have learned to trust Him in ALL things, right?  Be honest though... you have your moments or days too.  But WE Don't STAY there!  We press on toward the prize...

I still am not totally sure what the heavy heart was all about... but I know that when He is ready to show me, He will !!  One can always find just what is needed and required for the soul through prayer and His precious WORD! 

I have never been disappointed in God's response to my prayers! 

My afternoon was much better than my morning!  I was re-assured of His love and mercy and so thankful for His longsuffering!  God is Good ALL the time!

I'm thankful I have that hour during the middle of the day to "touch base" with Him when the morning quiet time just wasn't long enough!  He is so gracious to "reach out" and meet me there!

 

Technorati Tags: Prayer,Soul,Musing,thoughts,Mercy,THE WORD,Bible,Psalm 103

It's Here...2009!

I'll be quite honest, when I was young, I never thought I would see this year, let alone 2000.  It seemed so far away, a distant realm never to be reached.  Whew, it has sped toward me like lightening streaking from the heavenlies!

Bud and I celebrated our 41st wedding anniversary December 24th and while we didn't do anything special yet, as we were in Missouri with Fred's family, we will plan something.  My boss always gives me a gift card to a local restaurant for Christmas to use for our anniversary and we enjoy that, especially since it's free!  :)  

This past year has in some ways been an unusual year.  Bud was busy with trips to Illinois caring for his mother and then her death on Easter Sunday.

My parents moving in with us in April and adjusting to each of us no longer having an "empty nest".  We've both had some health issues... mine has been ongoing, but so far I've been blessed each time with "cancer free".  Then just before Christmas Bud's younger brother Fred lost his battle with metastatic renal carcinoma.  He fought hard to maintain a normal life right up to the end!  So, this has been quite a year for us. 

I'm "missing" my grandkids today!  I would love to see all of them and our great granddaughter, Chloe.  She's two now!!!!!  They are all growing up so fast.  Our oldest(Tim's son), Brian is 21 years old!  And Jason's son,  Brock will be 16 in April!

And Kailee  our precious granddaughter will be 15 on February 3rd.  I'm not ready for all this growing up!!!  I did get to see Micah and Gavin (Marc's sons) last week.  Micah is to my shoulder now and I'm 5'7".  He's only 10.  I think he's going to be tall like his daddy.  I hear he can play some mean ball. He's a good student too!  Little Gavin... he's my "munchkin".  He is full of little words of wisdom!  He's Papa Bud's boy... Granny Pam gets hugs, but he loves his Papa Bud. 

Oh by the way, if any of my dear sons or daughters are reading this... I NEED some photos of these dear grandchildren... school pix... please!

 

We had our Watch Night service last night.  Started at 8pm with a break around 10:15 for sandwiches and coffee & dessert.  All our ministers spoke and then pastor spoke last with it ending right at midnight with prayer.  All spoke from their hearts.

My thoughts for the New Year:

I've been thinking about resolutions and goals.  Some people are very goal oriented almost to the point that if their goals aren't met within their allotted time they become depressed.  I am a list maker.  I do like to set goals.  However, I am not "stuck" to those goals.  Some might say... "I wouldn't even write down any goals if I had that attitude about them."    I've found that "the best laid plans of mice and men..."  :D   We have to be open to change.  God never changes, but we have to be open to change for Him.  This can be really difficult for some; to make plans and then have them totally changed.  As I mentioned, I am a list maker.  I have lists for everything!  I occasionally misplace these lists!  :D   I don't like going to the grocery store (Sam's club) without my list.  I like to get the items on my list and then, "I'm outta there".   Shopping is not one of my favorite things to do anymore!

Back to my thought... the LORD gave me this scripture in Philippians 3:13-16 for the New Year:

13 Brethren, I do not count myself to have apprehended; but one thing I do, forgetting those things which are behind and reaching forward to those things which are ahead, (emphasis added)

14 I press toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus.
15 Therefore let us, as many as are mature, have this mind; and if in anything you think otherwise, God will reveal even this to you.

16 Nevertheless, to the degree that we have already attained, let us walk by the same rule, let us be of the same mind. (NKJ)

I love the way the Amplified reads:

13 I do not consider, brethren, that I have captured and made it my own [yet]; but one thing I do [it is my one aspiration]: forgetting what lies behind and straining forward to what lies ahead,

14 I press on toward the goal to win the [supreme and heavenly] prize to which God in Christ Jesus is calling us upward.

15 So let those [of us] who are spiritually mature and full-grown have this mind and hold these convictions; and if in any respect you have a different attitude of mind, God will make that clear to you also.

16 Only let us hold true to what we have already attained and walk and order our lives by that.

After all... whatever goals or aspirations I have for this coming year... they should revolve around "the main goal".  "Keeping the main thing, the main thing" as Bro. Tenney's book title states.  I can't undo last years mistakes or things not accomplished, I can only begin again.  It's a new year and a new day in the LORD... I want to press/strain toward that higher calling!  He is calling us.

The "unknown" of 2009 can be daunting!  But when I was first diagnosed with cancer this came into my possession, I don't remember how or when, but I know it was during a dark, alone period of time:

"When you come to the edge of all the light you know, and are about to step off into the darkness of the unknown,

Faith is knowing one of two things will happen: there will be something solid to stand on, or you will be taught how to fly."

I've never looked to see who the author was, but the words soothed my soul and they still do! 

I'm looking forward to whatever 2009 holds... I do know it has put me closer to His blessed returning, maybe sooner than I realize!

Have a blessed NEW YEAR with Jesus!

 

 

Technorati Tags: family,2009,gandkids,thoughts,musing,church,God,new day,new year

Ready, Willing, Waiting...

Judges 4:15-22 (English Standard Version)

15 And the LORD routed Sisera and all his chariots and all his army before Barak by the edge of the sword. And Sisera got down from his chariot and fled away on foot. 16And Barak pursued the chariots and the army to Harosheth-hagoyim, and all the army of Sisera fell by the edge of the sword; not a man was left.

17But Sisera fled away on foot to the tent of Jael, the wife of Heber the Kenite, for there was peace between Jabin the king of Hazor and the house of Heber the Kenite. 18And Jael came out to meet Sisera and said to him, "Turn aside, my lord; turn aside to me; do not be afraid." So he turned aside to her into the tent, and she covered him with a rug. 19And he said to her, "Please give me a little water to drink, for I am thirsty." So she opened a skin of milk and gave him a drink and covered him. 20And he said to her, "Stand at the opening of the tent, and if any man comes and asks you, 'Is anyone here?' say, 'No.'" 21But Jael the wife of Heber took a tent peg, and took a hammer in her hand. Then she went softly to him and drove the peg into his temple until it went down into the ground while he was lying fast asleep from weariness. So he died. 22And behold, as Barak was pursuing Sisera, Jael went out to meet him and said to him, "Come, and I will show you the man whom you are seeking." So he went in to her tent, and there lay Sisera dead, with the tent peg in his temple.

Jael had become tired and disgusted with the injustice in the land. She was not easily intimidated or fearful. She was not a "me" person. Her interest went beyond herself and she observed what was going on around her. She was concerned for "all" involved and how what was happening effected all around her. She was not a "for the moment" person. Jael realized there was more than just her needs and desires. Her interest and concern went beyond her own peace and security! She knew there was MORE! When her time came... she didn't hesitate to drive that peg through his head. She killed the enemy. She took advantage of the opportunity that came her way and accomplished her purpose for that day! How many times have we let the opportunity to "kill" the enemy slip by us?

How often do we wake up feeling... "LORD, what does today hold?" "What is my purpose for today?"

I recently heard... "heavy clouds today, but no rain..." Do you often feel the heaviness of heart (a burden) but don't see any rain? We look up and see the rain clouds, but never feel the rain fall on our cheeks! Could the rain we need to feel on our cheeks be the tears of repentance, submission, and commitment? We must be in a place to receive the rain from above.

Jael was willing to risk her own life so that others could find peace, security, and prosperity. Are we willing to sacrifice so that others can find this truth?

I've been doing a lot of thinking :) lately... and one of my thoughts has been on the question of, "What are the IDOLS in my life?" "What keeps me from praying, reading THE WORD, studying THE WORD, and my total commitment to soul winning?"

Think about what IDOLS you have in your life. Is it something that takes up your time? Is it something that puts you in financial bondage? Is it something that consumes your thoughts? Is it something unbiblical?

Please, don't misunderstand me... We are here in this world and we live "LIFE". I'm not talking about never having any enjoyment in life or even having things we enjoy. But when they consume us and deprive us of an "intimate" relationship with Jesus our Savior... something's not right. Sure, there might be times when we must miss church for work... but not consistently! If we choose (and I know these are hard times financially) to miss church consistently, eventually it will show outwardly because inwardly we are starving and malnourished. We must HEAR the WORD preached and taught.

God's choice to use Jael was because she was willing, obedient (the opposite of obedient is rebellious), and had a yielded heart. She was READY to be used. She was WAITING to be used. She ANTICPATED being used, and GOD used her.

Are we WILLING, READY, OBEDIENT and WAITING in ANTICIPATION for God to use us?

Just a few thoughts on my heart... God's blessings on all.

WHY GOD?

Why?

Are there days when you’ve ask yourself WHY? or ask God WHY? or even just wonder WHY things happen or people say the things they do?

Why do the ones you thought you could trust, say things indirectly, but intentionally within your range of hearing, to hurt you? And then watch for your reaction? Why? It’s especially disappointing when fellow believers do this to each other.

Is this what putting one’s trust totally in God means? We learn quickly that we can’t depend on man (mankind). The human carnal nature just seems to take control at times and then we can be the brunt of it. Most of us have the built in nature to TRUST first. That makes us vulnerable to those who desire to inflict pain, physical or emotional. So, those of us who prefer to trust first get hurt and then after several hurtful experiences, we eventually give up and no longer trust that particular person. It’s really shameful to have to deal with this type of attitude in the everyday world we live in let alone within the church. God wants so much for us to be willing and ready for him to use us, but we can be so shallow-minded that we don't get beyond the first lesson!

It’s in times like these, that we are so glad that we know Jesus and he’s our friend. In times like these, that’s when He’s a friend like no other. We can always depend on Him to carry us through.

I personally, am so thankful for his love and everlasting mercy. I never want to forget just how much he loves you and me.

There’s enough negativity in this world...let’s not bring it into our churches. Our church family is supposed to be a place of trust, peace, love, and encouragement. It’s not just a social club... we can join anything just to be with a group of people. Our fellowship is much more than that! We gather to worship the one true and living God... the God of our salvation. The God who trusted us with His Spirit... dwelling inside us. That’s a huge responsibility... Please don’t take it lightly! I certainly don't!

God is a loving God and for that I am ever thankful!
Without Him...there isn’t a LIFE!