Days to come...

My last post was on "Days Gone By..." the history of our lives. 

At some point in our life the realization that our days are numbered and God is the one who knows that number really becomes a loudly proclaimed TRUTH.

I suppose the subject of mortality has been in the back of my mind ever since my "cancer" diagnosis a few years ago.  Once "death" almost smacks you in the face I think one begins to "think" a little differently about "life and living".  You begin to review your "living" of life and what may once have been so important suddenly becomes the "least" important on your list. One's outlook on life drastically changes.  Your WINDOW's view of the WORLD is different today than it was yesterday when you thought your life was in your own hands.  We never "expect" to die. We always think that's for older people and until it hits your own life or family it seems distant.

Yes, I believe God is totally in control of my life.  Yes, I believe in His faithfulness, and love.  No, I'm not doubting His mercy and goodness.  He is GOD and He is GOOD all the time.  Yes, I believe in His WORD.  I love His Word.  I love to feel His presence HUG me and I love to feel His Shekinah Glory sweep over the congregation during a church service.  I love God with ALL my Heart, Mind, and Soul!!

I KNOW He's there through all of life's twists and turns, ups and downs.  Yes, He's there!  Even during a trying day full of trials and hardships... He's there and I know he's there!  Some of my days are not perfect in this imperfect world I live in... but He's there!  I'm not giddy with a school-girl infatuation, I've a deep rooted love and JOY in my Salvation!

When "those days" come... I can begin to "Praise Him" and praise right through the trial.  I've had the Holy Ghost since just after my 8th Birthday... He has never disappointed me.  I'm not one of His perfect children (are there any?)... I have my days when I have to get a grip on my attitude.  I work with the public everyday and I cannot reflect inner feelings to my clients. 

I'm one of those pilgrims who are on a journey through this world and I'm headed for the PROMISE Land.  The path may be rough at times... but there's always the "refreshing time" of His presence when He's walking right beside us, leading and guiding us on that path. 

As a pastor's wife of 40-years, I've seen those newly birthed struggle with the cares and concerns of life and sometimes the baggage of their past life seems to cling tightly.  My concern is that we pray, teach, and be REAL people to these who struggle with trials and tribulations. 

Time marches on... tomorrow will be here in about 4 minutes!  I want to be REAL to those who enter into the realm of my life and through the doors of our church.  I want to encourage them... "you can make it through".  Hold tightly to those out stretched hands. 

Maybe some who are reading this think I'm being "un-joyful", I'm not!  But I've seen the hurting, the helpless, and the hopeless.  Our cities are full of them.  My heart goes out to those who are "forgotten" or "overlooked" and I'm not just talking about the homeless.

And there go I, except by the grace and mercy of God...

I never want to forget that could be me.  Yes, I'm thankful I was raised in a God-fearing Pentecostal-Apostolic home.  Yes, I'm thankful for Sunday School teachers and ministers/pastors who taught the Word.  I'm thankful for the fellowship of my Brothers and Sisters in the LORD.  I'm thankful for a husband/pastor who preaches and teaches God's Word.  I am blessed!

Well Tomorrow has arrived...and it's another Day I choose to purposely live for Jesus. 

Let's be REAL for JESUS... I always think of the "Velveteen Rabbit" story... I want to have bare spots, torn spots, lose an ear or eye, come unstitched with the stuffing hanging out from  being "used" everyday.  I want to be vulnerable, open and willing to be used anyway He wants to use me.    I don't want to be stuck on the shelf and never taken down. 

Let Him choose me, that's my prayer!

 

Technorati Tags: Thoughts,Bible,JOY,God,REALNESS,Vulnerable,thankful,mercy,grace,Praise

Days Gone By...

January 2009 is almost past... wow!  Time is rapidly progressing.  Yesterdays seem to be coming faster and faster and tomorrows arrive too quickly!  We are in the FUTURE before we even realize it.  Our days become HISTORY much to swiftly.

I remember when I was very young and thinking that summer was forever!  The days seemed endless and we played "outside" from early morning until late at night.  Then some where in my span of life... the days started getting shorter and shorter.  It seems I no sooner get to bed than it's time to wake up! 

The phrase "Days Gone By" popped into my head while I was reading my Bible during my morning quiet time.  I'm still pondering all that it implies.

I was reading and thinking, we don't always remember that these are REAL people with REAL problems so similar to us today.  Relationships, financial, clean water and edible food, worship, belief, faith, doubts and on and on...  Yes, REAL people just like we are today.  Same desires emotionally, physically, and spiritually...  Same "intentions" of doing what is RIGHT in God's sight...  And yes, we have the same struggles in keeping those good and desirable intentions. 

Why do we fight so hard and struggle against the powers of this World?  That's the warfare of the OLD carnal fleshly nature and our NEW nature filled with His Spirit!  I've seen New Converts (and some not so new) struggle and wrestle with these two natures and decide they just don't have the energy to "keep on keeping on". 

Why is it so hard?  My thinking is... we just don't totally "give up" and submit to His Spirit and His Will for our lives. 

What's the saying: 

Live HARD for Jesus and it's easy...  Live EASY and it's hard.

I may have messed that quote up some, but you get my point.  Whenever we put our mind to do and live RIGHT that's when the struggle truly begins.  Spiritual Growth occurs during those struggles.  Endurance... Enduring... Patience... Waiting... those are words that many of us just don't like to hear.  We are a NOW generation and I admit, when I've set my mind to do something, I want to do it now!  I want to "git er dun" too!  It's hard for me to realize God may not want "it" done right now!    Sarah (and Abraham) jumped ahead of God's plan... Rebekah took it upon herself to orchestrate God's plan... and on it goes.  Aren't we just as guilty?

I'm not sure we'll totally master this "struggle" until we are "outta here"... but I'm trying and I'll keep on trying!  I've found that in my humanity and struggle to be totally dependent on God and His Will (and not trying to manipulate Him)...  He's so patient, longsuffering, and compassionate, ever loving! 

I can see His tender look and hear His quiet loving voice filled with patience:

Daughter, daughter, you just don't know... wait and see...

Bless the LORD, O my soul...

 

I woke this morning with a heavy heart and "my spirit" was downhearted.  Not totally aware of the reason for my downheartedness, I worked through the morning, being careful NOT to let my spirit reflect outwardly.  

At 1:30pm I jumped into my car for my hour lunch break thinking I was going to run some errands like I usually do.  I soon found myself  parked in a parking lot just down the street from where I work, asking myself "what am I doing here?"  I soon discovered the reason I had parked.

Grabbing my Bible out of my satchel, I opened immediately to Psalm 103... these words jumped out at me: (the underlining is my emphasis)

Bless the LORD, O my soul; and all that is within me, bless His holy name!

Bless the LORD, O my soul, and forget not all His benefits.

I then read on:

Who forgives all your iniquities, who heals all your diseases.

Who redeems your life from destruction, who crowns you with loving kindness and tender mercies,

Who satisfies your mouth with good things, so that your youth is renewed like the eagle's.

The LORD executes righteousness and justice for all who are oppressed.

He made known His ways to Moses, His acts to the children of Israel.

The LORD is merciful and gracious, slow to anger, and abounding in mercy.

Read all the verses... but then again beginning with vs.17:

But the mercy of the LORD is from everlasting to everlasting on those who fear Him, and His righteousness to children's children.

To such as keep His covenant, and to those who remember His commandments to do them.

The LORD has established His throne in heaven and His kingdom rules over all.   (Read on...)

The last verse of Psalm 103:

Bless the LORD, all His works, in all places of His dominion.  Bless the LORD, O my soul.

Well, needless to say, after reading this chapter... my heart was once again refreshed and full of God's love and mercy and my faith and trust in His will was strengthened!  How could I ever have doubts about His will?  After all these years.... you'd think I'd have learned to trust Him in ALL things, right?  Be honest though... you have your moments or days too.  But WE Don't STAY there!  We press on toward the prize...

I still am not totally sure what the heavy heart was all about... but I know that when He is ready to show me, He will !!  One can always find just what is needed and required for the soul through prayer and His precious WORD! 

I have never been disappointed in God's response to my prayers! 

My afternoon was much better than my morning!  I was re-assured of His love and mercy and so thankful for His longsuffering!  God is Good ALL the time!

I'm thankful I have that hour during the middle of the day to "touch base" with Him when the morning quiet time just wasn't long enough!  He is so gracious to "reach out" and meet me there!

 

Technorati Tags: Prayer,Soul,Musing,thoughts,Mercy,THE WORD,Bible,Psalm 103

It's Here...2009!

I'll be quite honest, when I was young, I never thought I would see this year, let alone 2000.  It seemed so far away, a distant realm never to be reached.  Whew, it has sped toward me like lightening streaking from the heavenlies!

Bud and I celebrated our 41st wedding anniversary December 24th and while we didn't do anything special yet, as we were in Missouri with Fred's family, we will plan something.  My boss always gives me a gift card to a local restaurant for Christmas to use for our anniversary and we enjoy that, especially since it's free!  :)  

This past year has in some ways been an unusual year.  Bud was busy with trips to Illinois caring for his mother and then her death on Easter Sunday.

My parents moving in with us in April and adjusting to each of us no longer having an "empty nest".  We've both had some health issues... mine has been ongoing, but so far I've been blessed each time with "cancer free".  Then just before Christmas Bud's younger brother Fred lost his battle with metastatic renal carcinoma.  He fought hard to maintain a normal life right up to the end!  So, this has been quite a year for us. 

I'm "missing" my grandkids today!  I would love to see all of them and our great granddaughter, Chloe.  She's two now!!!!!  They are all growing up so fast.  Our oldest(Tim's son), Brian is 21 years old!  And Jason's son,  Brock will be 16 in April!

And Kailee  our precious granddaughter will be 15 on February 3rd.  I'm not ready for all this growing up!!!  I did get to see Micah and Gavin (Marc's sons) last week.  Micah is to my shoulder now and I'm 5'7".  He's only 10.  I think he's going to be tall like his daddy.  I hear he can play some mean ball. He's a good student too!  Little Gavin... he's my "munchkin".  He is full of little words of wisdom!  He's Papa Bud's boy... Granny Pam gets hugs, but he loves his Papa Bud. 

Oh by the way, if any of my dear sons or daughters are reading this... I NEED some photos of these dear grandchildren... school pix... please!

 

We had our Watch Night service last night.  Started at 8pm with a break around 10:15 for sandwiches and coffee & dessert.  All our ministers spoke and then pastor spoke last with it ending right at midnight with prayer.  All spoke from their hearts.

My thoughts for the New Year:

I've been thinking about resolutions and goals.  Some people are very goal oriented almost to the point that if their goals aren't met within their allotted time they become depressed.  I am a list maker.  I do like to set goals.  However, I am not "stuck" to those goals.  Some might say... "I wouldn't even write down any goals if I had that attitude about them."    I've found that "the best laid plans of mice and men..."  :D   We have to be open to change.  God never changes, but we have to be open to change for Him.  This can be really difficult for some; to make plans and then have them totally changed.  As I mentioned, I am a list maker.  I have lists for everything!  I occasionally misplace these lists!  :D   I don't like going to the grocery store (Sam's club) without my list.  I like to get the items on my list and then, "I'm outta there".   Shopping is not one of my favorite things to do anymore!

Back to my thought... the LORD gave me this scripture in Philippians 3:13-16 for the New Year:

13 Brethren, I do not count myself to have apprehended; but one thing I do, forgetting those things which are behind and reaching forward to those things which are ahead, (emphasis added)

14 I press toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus.
15 Therefore let us, as many as are mature, have this mind; and if in anything you think otherwise, God will reveal even this to you.

16 Nevertheless, to the degree that we have already attained, let us walk by the same rule, let us be of the same mind. (NKJ)

I love the way the Amplified reads:

13 I do not consider, brethren, that I have captured and made it my own [yet]; but one thing I do [it is my one aspiration]: forgetting what lies behind and straining forward to what lies ahead,

14 I press on toward the goal to win the [supreme and heavenly] prize to which God in Christ Jesus is calling us upward.

15 So let those [of us] who are spiritually mature and full-grown have this mind and hold these convictions; and if in any respect you have a different attitude of mind, God will make that clear to you also.

16 Only let us hold true to what we have already attained and walk and order our lives by that.

After all... whatever goals or aspirations I have for this coming year... they should revolve around "the main goal".  "Keeping the main thing, the main thing" as Bro. Tenney's book title states.  I can't undo last years mistakes or things not accomplished, I can only begin again.  It's a new year and a new day in the LORD... I want to press/strain toward that higher calling!  He is calling us.

The "unknown" of 2009 can be daunting!  But when I was first diagnosed with cancer this came into my possession, I don't remember how or when, but I know it was during a dark, alone period of time:

"When you come to the edge of all the light you know, and are about to step off into the darkness of the unknown,

Faith is knowing one of two things will happen: there will be something solid to stand on, or you will be taught how to fly."

I've never looked to see who the author was, but the words soothed my soul and they still do! 

I'm looking forward to whatever 2009 holds... I do know it has put me closer to His blessed returning, maybe sooner than I realize!

Have a blessed NEW YEAR with Jesus!

 

 

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